Suzuka

Maybe I'm just getting too old for these high school melodramas. Alright, I AM too old for them. Which may be the problem I have with these sorts of shows. Because Suzuka is filled with so much melodrama and teenage angst that only Peach Girl has so far topped for me.

So here's the story:
Yamato Akitsuki has transferred to a new school. He is going to live at his aunt's boarding house/bath house, where only females live (can't remember if that's a rule, or that's just how it turned out). Rather like Love Hina (and Ai Yori Aoshi, and every other damn story like this), he somehow becomes a live in handy man and janitor. On his way to his aunt's building, he passes by the school he will be attending and witnesses a girl performing the high jump. He falls instantly in love with this nameless girl. And boy is he surprised when he gets to his new home to find out that she rents the room right next to his. This is Suzuka Asahina, one of the stars of the track team.

For ridiculously complicated reasons that are revealed later, Suzuka is incredibly cold to Yamato, who is basically throwing himself at her at every opportunity. In fact, in order to gain her admiration, he joins the track team as a sprinter (but it completely back fires and she hates him even more). Turns out he's an excellent runner, and soon rises to the top of the team; but his sole purpose for running is Suzuka's affections, and you better bet his talent waxes and wanes depending on the current status of their relationship (or lack thereof). The guy is a total tool. He's not doing it for himself, or for his team, but all for the sake of a girl who often will barely speak a word to him. A girl who, in fact, he himself wonders why he even likes. He admits to himself that Suzuka isn't at all charming, that she has a bad temper, throws tantrums, is incredibly inconsistent with her feelings, and is in fact rather a bitch (MAN she's a freakin' bitch). "She's not charming at all. But I still like her." Er, what? Sounds like Yamato needs a good smack. OH WAIT. Suzuka already did that NUMEROUS times, and it didn't help.

Suzuka is so frustrating. She leads Yamato on for a few hours, and then the very next day glares and yells at him. She goes to him for comfort during a storm, and then "bitch bitch bitch" all the next day. He confesses, she turns him down. He confesses again, she starts screaming at him. He tries to call her on her shit, she slaps him across the face...repeatedly. When he finally decides to try another girl (an adorable and sweet girl named Honoka who has been in love with him for years), she gets crazy jealous and tries to put herself into his life. What. The. Fuck. I would never put up with a crazy bitch like that if I were a guy, no matter how hot she was (and she's really not that great looking; there are other female characters far more attractive than Suzuka who are all over Yamato). She's been emotionally scarred by events of her past, but that gives her no reason to treat Yamato the way she does. It's a small excuse for her behavior, but it hardly excuses all of it.

The animation of the show is so-so. Music is average. The story is all over the place. The athletic events are not at all well represented. Yamato runs the 100 meter sprint, which takes like 11 seconds. I swear they spent 3 minutes on him running some race, plotting out his moves, etc. There's no way he'd ever have time to think about it that much in 11 freaking seconds. Even if you consider the idea that time "slows" in those situations, to the person, there's still no way for him to think through that much in one race, or to change what he's doing within the race.

It's not a good sign when the main characters of a show are completely unlikeable. The only thing that makes it tolerable is Honoka, and she really gets a bum deal in the story. I should also note that Todd Haberkorn (who I mentioned before in my xxxHolic review) voices Yamato in the English dub. He's still annoying. If this interests you at all, all 26 episodes are currently available from FUNimation.

Image: Honoka, Yamato, Suzuka

xxxHolic

xxxHolic currently encompasses two anime series, a two episode OAV, and a movie release. This particular review will cover the original series which is currently available through FUNimation in the states. It is simply titled xxxHolic, and is typically pronounced "Holic."

xxxHolic centers on Kimihiro Watanuki, a high school student who can see spirits, and is also a magnet for spirits. His life is impacted by fellow classmates Shizuka Doumeki, whose family runs a local shrine, and Himawari Kunogi, whom Watanuki has a serious crush on. They have all been connected by a mysterious woman calling herself Yuuko Ichihara, who runs a shop that grants wishes. Keeping Yuuko company are the cheerful girls Moro and Maru, and a black Mokona (just like white Mokona from Tsubasa).

One day Watanuki is being chased by oppressive evil spirits, and while trying to escape from them he passes through a fence that surrounds Yuuko's shop. Yuuko offers to grant his wish (what that is isn't clear, but one would assume it has something to do with his ability to attract and see spirits), but she never does anything for free. In exchange Watanuki must work in Yuuko's shop. Mostly he cooks for her (his father was a chef, and he picked up the skill), but he also cleans and runs errands. He also manages to lend a (typically clumsy) hand in Yuuko's wish granting.

According to Yuuko, everything is inevitable and there are no coincidences. Everyone who comes to her shop arrives for a reason, and if they have no reason they will never even notice the shop exists. Included in this inevitability are the meeting of Watanuki, Himawari and Doumeki. Along with Watanuki's powers, these two classmates have powers of their own. They're not made explicitly clear within this series, but it seems that where Watanuki attracts spirits, Doumeki repels them (though he cannot see them himself). Himawari appears to have the (unknown to her and...well probably everybody but Yuuko, though she doesn't say anything) ability to break seals (ah, a quick wiki search says that she causes misfortune to those around her, which would include breaking seals holding back evil powers, I suppose).

The show goes episode by episode, typically with a different customer with a different problem arriving in each for Yuuko to help, or Watanuki to attempt to aid in his own way. There are a few recurring things that tie them together, like the Zashiki-warashi (a sprite) that has a crush on Watanuki, and the fox spirits who own a food stand. Yuuko's customers have various problems like habitually lieing, an addiction to computers, and a woman who always makes irrational decisions. Scattered between these customers with "bad habits" are episodes involving the entire gang telling ghost stories, spending the night in haunted houses, exploring superstitions, and learning about their powers.

Fans of Tsubasa Chronicle will recognize several of these characters. The Tsubasa gang (in their respective show) arrives at Yuuko's shop to gain the power of moving between dimensions (the white Mokona). This isn't really touched upon in the xxxHolic anime at all (you never even see white Mokona, though Yuuko does mention there is a second); it's never mentioned, though Fay's staff is seen in an episode. This seems to be sadly due to a licensing issue with the anime studios. This connection is, of course, in the manga. There are a few other Clamp references in the show (like a pair of Chobit ear pods Watanuki uses as headphones).

The animation style is pretty unique. The characters have extremely (absurdly) long limbs, and there's an angular almost blocky style to their designs. The intro song is excellent, though there isn't anything really noticeable about the score other than it fits the show (which is the important thing anyway).

xxxHolic is a 24 episode series, currently available on 6 DVDs and in box sets. Watched on the Funimation channel with a good English dub, except for Watanuki, who is almost intolerably voiced by Todd Haberkorn. Though if we want to be honest here, Watanki is a pretty annoying character; the show needs more Doumeki.

Pictured: Watanuki, Yuuko, Doumeki

Sasami Magical Girls Club

An alternate universe spin-off of the Tenchi Muyo! series, Sasami Magical Girls Club focuses on a magical girl version of Sasami Iwakura (not to be confused with the Sasami from Magical Girl Pretty Sammy/Magical Project S). Several Tenchi characters have appearances in the show, including Washu, Misao (from Pretty Sammy), Mihoshi, and Ryo-Ohki. Washu and Mihoshi take on the role of teachers, Misao is again Sasami's best friend, and Ryo-Ohki is Ryo-Ohki.

In Sasami Magical Girls Club (SMGC), a group of 5 fifth grade girls discovers that they each have magical powers. They are half witch, half human descendants from the World of the Witches (so "witches" are pure witches and magical girls have human ancestry). Many, many years ago the witches lived with the humans on Earth, but they suffered at the hands of the humans who feared and hated them. They created their own world where they retreated to, and some of them brought human lovers and friends along with them. These humans, who had no magic powers of their own, became known as story tellers. Eventually some of these people returned back to Earth, and that leads to the present day. Magical girls around the world are awakening, including Sasami, Misao, Makoto, Tsukasa and Anri.

Washu and her assistant Daimon (both story tellers) are sent from the world of the witches to watch this particular group of magical girls. Originally they were instructed to help the girls control their magic, with the object being to restrict their powers. But these orders seem to be discarded when all the magical girls (and boys) are invited to the world of the witches for a training camp, much to Washu's confusion. The witches begin to show particular interest in Sasami and her friends, who appear to be able to use a rare form of light magic. The girls then become caught up in a dark plot by the Chief Sorceress who plans to use their talents to further her own goals.

The series focuses mostly on Sasami and Misao, who represent the light and dark sides of magic. Sasami's innocence and kindness contrasts with Misao's loneliness and jealousy. Sasami's light magic is a pure form of magic, while Misao's dark magic is fueled by feelings like hate, jealousy, and sadness. Throughout the show each of the girls (though Sasami and Misao in particular) must sort out their feelings and learn about the strength of friendship. It stars a group of fifth grade girls, so the show does have a child-like feel to it, and it's probably geared toward preteen girls and young teenage girls. That doesn't mean it isn't suited for anyone older, because the show doesn't overwhelm the viewer with a sort of dumbed down view of the world. It's serious issues that are seen through the eyes of children, but with that child-like maturity that often makes them more receptive than those of us who are much older. What I'm trying to say is that it's not just some "kiddy show." It's very cute, but it's also very charming. The ending of the show felt rather weak to me, but otherwise I enjoyed the series very much.

SMGC has a fitting animation style, cute and colorful. The songs are good as well. Though I think I would have enjoyed them more had I been listening to them in Japanese and not a horrid English rerecording. Again, I understand why this is done, because they want to appeal to a wider audience, but they could at least get some decent, real singers (ps - I'm available). There is also a rather charming song sung throughout the show (which serves as a main them as well), performed by various characters, with a lovely addictive melody.

I watched the 26 episode SMGC on the FUNimation channel, with English dialog. I was pleased by the voice over for the most part; the young girls are voiced by some FUNi regulars (Brina Palencia, Brittney Karbowski, Cherami Leigh, Monica Rial, probably a lesser known Alison Viktorin in the title role, with the excellent Caitlin Glass voicing the Chief Sorceress). A little weak and confusing at the very end, but otherwise a good all around show.
In the image: at the top are Misao (left) and Tsukasa, with Makoto, Sasami and Anri at the bottom, and of course Ryo-Ohki in the corner.

Moon Phase

Tsukuyomi: Moon Phase is a 25 episode series, with a 26th bonus episode (unrelated to the main story). FUNimation released the series as Moon Phase.

Moon Phase is a vampire anime. But instead of being totally bad ass like Hellsing, or sexy and Gothic like Vampire Knight, it's sickeningly cute (or it tries to be) but also too serious for its own good. I would have enjoyed it far better without the young vampire Hazuki/Luna, but then there wouldn't really be a story. Actually, I think there would, because the other characters are really interesting, there just wouldn't be a focus or a catalyst.

My problem with the show lies in its failed effort to balance overly cute characters with a serious story line. Ditch the idiotic and pointless random cat ears (and sometimes tails), have Hazuki look older than a 12-year-old (and act older than a 5-year-old), and it might actually be a decent show. The darker sides of the story (particulary Elfriede's past, Kouhei's latent powers, the disappearance of Kouhei's mother which I don't recall ever having been fully explained, or the also rather unexplained death of Hazuki's mother) would make a great show on their own, but they're over shadowed by too many goofy and over dramatic scenes.

Moon Phase follows freelance paranormal photographer Kouhei, who appears to be in his early 20s, and is a magnet for paranormal activity, even though he can't interact with it in any way himself. He can't even see the spirits that tend to congregate around him. He is also what is called the Vampire's Lover, which means he can't become a vampire's slave, and his blood has the power to free other vampires from their masters. While on a photo shoot of an old German castle he runs into Hazuki (also known as Luna, her more malignant alter ego), a teenage vampire who is being held captive in the castle. By drinking Kouhei's blood she frees herself and is able to escape the castle. As she is basically just a child, Kouhei takes her to his home to live with him and his grandfather Ryuuhei who owns an antique shop, and who is also a powerful spiritualist and exorcist. Many vampires are out to get Hazuki both for her power, and to bring her back under control at the castle. Kouhei and his family (which includes his grandfather, his cousin Seiji, his fiancee (by an arranged marriage) Kaoru, Kaoru's twin sister Hikaru (engaged to Seiji), and Yayoi, a power exorcist in the family) work to protect Hazuki from those who are out to get her. Along the way the vampire Elfriede, who once worked to capture Hazuki, switches sides and also helps to protect her.

I'm a bit bothered by how actively Kaoru and Hikaru, who look to be about 12-years-old, pursue their affections for the much older Seiji and Kouhei (particularly by Kaoru's persistent attempts to pull Kouhei's attention away from Hazuki by acting like a cat). On top of the obvious romantic sensibilities between 14-year-old Hazuki and Kouhei. I know that these sorts of relationships aren't as big of a deal in Japan as they are here, but it doesn't make me any less disturbed by them. Though I don't suppose a brother-sister relationship is really appropriate when the girl in question is "kissing" you once a month so she can suck your blood. I was also kind of annoyed by how often the story needlessly draws out certain plot twists or secrets, especially when they're so painfully obvious to the audience. Hiding it from the characters is one thing, but continuing to try and make it some absurd mystery to the audience when they already know the answer is unnecessary.

The animation is quite good, at least. Though it's got to have one of the most annoying opening songs I've ever heard. I also must mention again how much the cat ears that appear on the heads of various characters (mostly Hazuki) for no real reason (other than to look cute, I assume), and on random pieces of scenery, really annoyed me. Moon Phase isn't horrible, though it could be much better. Maybe the balance is better in the manga, but I doubt it. I wouldn't watch it in English though. Hazuki's English voice is probably one of the reasons I disliked her so much, and the same goes for Kaoru. I also wondered why "cute animal-like side kick" equals "speech impediment." I watched it on the FUNimation channel, so I didn't have the option to listen to it in Japanese. Unless annoyingly cute vampire lolita girls are your thing though, I wouldn't really bother.

School Rumble

School Rumble is a high school romantic comedy. To be frank, I don't think it has many merits. Jay, you probably shouldn't read this one; I may be about to rip it a new one and I know it's one of your favorites.

It's not a total failure. It does have some funny moments, though most are at the risk of complete absurdity. In fact, as the show goes on, it gets increasingly more absurd. I know it's difficult to discuss anime in the realm of reality, but School Rumble is a realistic show as far as anime is concerned (no magical girls, demon hunters, robots, or ninjas), but it also strays from reality so often that the show doesn't even make any sense for the most part.

The basic storyline is a series of love triangles (and quadrangles) involving the main characters. Tenma (the hyperactive ditzy heroine) is in love with Karasuma (a quiet mysterious boy), Harima is in love with Tenma (the "hero" of the show and a delinquent), Tenma's close friend Eri (a rich girl and, to be honest, a real bitch) is in love with Harima, Yakumo (Tenma's younger sister, a quiet girl who can read people's surface thoughts...or something) who also likes Harima, and Hanai (a hotheaded martial arts expert) who is in love with Yakumo. There's also Mikoto (a friend of Tenma's and another martial artist) and Akira (another friend of Tenma's with little going on). There are other characters with less focus, though they also add to the love triangles, as if there weren't enough (another boy in love with Tenma, a girl in love with a boy who loves Mikoto, and some crazy Mexican wrestling girl).

For a girl who holds the interest of two guys (one of them obsessively), Tenma has no special qualities to speak of. In fact she has no redeeming qualities at all, really. She's unintelligent (which is a nice way of saying she's a moron), one of the worst older sisters I've ever seen, a ditz, a klutz, completely dense, mostly useless, very plain, and unfortunately meddlesome. At least she's a decent friend (in that she cares about them). It's hard to see what the other guys see in her, though to best honest Harima isn't exactly a catch himself. He's a delinquent, gets into fights all the time, has a short temper, jumps to conclusions easily, gets caught in way too many unfortunate situations, and fulfills his fantasies with Tenma by drawing them out in a comic book instead of growing a backbone and just confessing to her already.

The story in School Rumble follows these characters through their day-to-day lives. Mostly it deals with unrequited love, incomplete confessions, great misunderstandings, school functions (like festivals and field trips).... Well mostly Harima's attempts to convey his feelings to Tenma, and Tenma's attempts to gain Karasuma's attentions. The rest of the show sort of revolves around the consequences of the actions (or inactions) the two main characters perpetrate.

26 episodes and nothing freaking happens. Relationships don't progress, no one confesses anything, story lines don't wrap up. Things just get more ridiculous and more complicated. Which is why, I assume, there are 2 more seasons. Though there's no reason it couldn't all have been resolved in a single season considering all the useless stuff that's in there that wouldn't be missed if it was removed (meaning it wouldn't really affect the story). There's no way I could sit through 2 more seasons of this stuff though, so I have no idea what ends up happening to everyone. Although looking over it...the third season is unanimated? Except for a couple of OVA episodes, it seems.

I'm willing to believe that part of the reason I have such a great dislike for this show is that I was only able to watch it in English on the Funimation channel. Because they don't hard sub their shows for television (I don't mean the dialog but the kanji and hiragana onscreen), I miss out on a lot of the Japanese characters that are scattered frequently throughout the series (like the thoughts Yakumo sees, or random word bubbles). On top of that the English dubbing is considerably less than spectacular, specifically for Tenma. At least they left the songs in Japanese. If you're interested, Funimation is hosting some of the episodes (including the first 8 of S1) from the first and second seasons on their website. They started releasing the second season of School Rumble on DVD late last year.

As for me, I'll stick with Azumanga Daioh.

First Rant of 2009

Sorry, I have some things I want to rant and rave about. :)

Number 1: Some crazy Senator from South Carolina wants to outlaw profanity. Like, everywhere. In public, in video games, in movies, in books, on TV....
The law would make it illegal "for a person in a public forum or place of public accommodation wilfully and knowingly to publish orally or in writing, exhibit, or otherwise make available material containing words, language, or actions of a profane, vulgar, lewd, lascivious, or indecent nature."
Which would basically ban...almost everything in existence from the state of South Carolina. This would make these acts a felony, with a maximum $5,000 fine or up to 5 years in prison.
Talk about having a stick up your ass. How would that even be enforceable? You know, if it wasn't in total violation of the First Amendment.
If you live in South Carolina, I suggest sending this guy a nice letter telling him to fuck off. I bet that would totally make his day.

I also wanted to comment on the increasing practice of releasing game demos as a pre-order bonus. Mostly I wanted to say...that it doesn't make any sense what-so-ever. The reasons I am seeing to justify this are that it creates your own personal army of game supporters, to go out and spread the word about how awesome your game is. Or that a company is so confident in their game that they want to show it to you early, even though you already decided to buy the game. Which is what confuses me. Why give your demo only to people who are already planning to purchase the game? Sure you can argue that you mostly just have to put 5 bucks down on these things, and you can switch that over to another reserve, or cancel the reserve, or whatever. Which is contrary to the purpose. Because I'm sure these companies expect that a pre-order = a purchase. Unless what they're saying is that they trust in their product so much that they're confident they can show you the game early, confident that this will make you more impassioned (for a game you already decided to buy), and will be...more sure to buy it? As opposed to...the demo being crap and you canceling your order? But...wouldn't you want as many people as possible able to check out your game, so that there are even MORE people who will immediately go out and buy the game? I should make it clear that what I'm talking about here are demo exclusives. Like the Killzone 2 demo being available only to those who pre-order the game from GameStop. Until one day before the game's release, when it will be released free to the public.
Which is fine. I mean, you don't really need to play a demo so far in advance of the game's release. The game won't be going anywhere once it comes out. It's just that the concept of handing out your demo only to people who are already planning to buy the game doesn't make any sense.

Next on my list is just a bit of news. Final Fantasy XIII won't see an American release until 2010. Kotaku has a nicely made image to go along with this announcement. I can't say I'm surprised it's getting delayed, though I was sure Square had mentioned at E3 that the game would get a simultaneous US/Japan release. And this contradicts that statement. But it's possible I'm imagining that promise and instead recalling a similar promise for the releases of Infinite Undiscovery and The Last Remnant. Or that they simply said it would release simultaneously on the PS3 and 360 in America. Still.... They are porting the game to the 360 (which they've said they won't even start until the PS3 version in completed). And then there's the whole translating the game into English and redubbing everything. So I realize these games take a long time to make, but I also recall this game being announced back in like...2004.

Let's see.... Wrap things up here.... Circuit City is liquidating all of their stores, so go take advantage of their misfortune!
Also, please keep Keanu Reeves out of my Cowboy Bebop! I think the movie itself is pretty much confirmed, though it's still unclear whether Keanu is confirmed for the role or if he's just running around saying that he wants the role (more likely). I don't really mind the guy. He's a bad actor, but at least he knows he is. And for that reason I wish he'd stay away from the movie.

A slow start

If my lovely readers are still checking in, I'm sorry for a slow few weeks. I'm in the middle of several things, and once they're done I'll have some things to talk about again. Moon Phase and School Rumble are within a week or 2 of completion (Jay, I did decide to finish them, despite my early grumblings). Though due to some mail box and post office shenanigans the shows coming through on my Netflix list have been slow and a little mixed up. Was hoping to have both .hack//Sign and .hack//Legend of Twilight finished by now, but it's going to take a bit longer before I can get started on The Twelve Kingdoms.

The FUNimation channel is premiering a Tenchi Muyo spin off starting Monday morning: Sasami Magical Girls Club (9 am Eastern in between Peach Girl and Suzuka). Will be checking that out, and Suzuka when it comes around to the first episode again.

I still want to talk about Kuroshitsuji, and will do that later today or tomorrow. Also Telepathy Shojou Ran (I don't think I ever did a full review of the show), which I just finished. And I also want to make mention of Natsume Yuujinchou, a series with a second season now being shown on the website Crunchyroll (the first season should be hosted there as well). So I really do have plenty of things to talk about, I just need to put down the Xbox controller long enough to do so.